Generic Cheerios Cereal – Questionable Recipe

Generic Cheerios

Super A Associated Generic Cheerios Cereal

I love buying generic versions of foods in the grocery store. The prices obviously are better but what I love the most is the packaging. Here is a recent purchase of Toasted Oats – obviously a blatant rip off of Cheerios. I love the “timeless” clip art of the milk, the milk pitcher and the green plastic basket of strawberries. The taste of these by the way are 100% no different from Cheerios at a fraction of the cost.

What is kind of funny and disturbing at the same time however is the featured recipe they have on the side panel for Munchy Jumble. First of all, what is Munchy Jumble mean? Secondly take a closer look at the ingredients. No really take a 2nd look at the ingredients. Onion Salt, Butter Soy sauce and Worchester sauce???? OMG this can’t be real. I’m almost tempted to take this one step further and make the damn recipe just to see what it tastes like but wait, I already know it’s going to be disgusting. It’s got to be some sick joke from the so called “marketing” department for the Toasted Oats – they probably know that people only purchase and eat the Toasted Oats cause they are generic substitute for Cheerios and figure who the hell is actually going to pay attention to the recipies on the box? Anyways come on, I know the marketing dept can come up with better recipies than this right? Here’s a letter I’m going to send to them:

July 31st 2006

Plate Of The Day
1234 Central Park West
NY, NY 10025

Marketing and Packaging Department
Associated Food Stores
Hewlett, NY 11557

Dear Marketing Department,

I am an avid fan of your fine line of quality cereal products. I particularly enjoy the Toasted Oats cereal. Not only is it an excellent source of 9 vitamins and minerals but it’s also amazingly delicious and a treat that I look forward to every morning, afternoon, and night. As a bonus I try to recreate the enticing display you have on the cover of the cereal box, although I still haven’t been able to find a ceramic pitcher that looks the same (mine’s plastic).

I really wanted to commend you on the Munchy Jumble Recipe you have featured on the side panel. It’s been an instant hit at all my house parties and the stuff just magically disappears – it’s also a great conversation starter at any any cocktail party. I’m writing to you however in the hopes of obtaining more recipies from you. The following is something that we always look forward to cooking up after a night of heavy drinking on the town. We call it Hangoooveros – like the name? It’s a great way to prevent any next day hangover symptoms.


2 cups of raw ground beef or pork
2 slices of bacon
1 can of chunklight tuna

2 cups of flour
1/2 cup of whole milk
3 cups of Toasted Oats
1 package of Top Ramen
1 egg

2 tablespoons of Cayenne Pepper (or more to taste)
1 cup of butter or margerine

Prepare an oven with a rack on the highest level and set to broil. Mix dry ingredients together along with spices. Beat in with a fork the butter/margerine. Add meat products and egg. Blend with milk. Using your hands create patties and fry over a high heat and sear each side for approx 5 minutes. Take patties on a prepared cookie sheet (with aluminum foil or greased) and broil for 5 mins till crispy. Serve over bread immediate. Serves 2 or just one depending on how many beers you’ve had.

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